Yesterday I went out to the mall here in St. Louis.  I have shopping malaise, wherein I have just been bored to tears at the stores.  I mean, I went into an ExpressMen and even the shop clerks were like “hi. can i help you? we’re having a sale right now blah blah blah.”  Ok, I might have made the blah blah blah part up.  But it was very bored.  I think it’s part of this overall economy.  

Anyway, Mall Fashion:  There is something about the mall that causes people to dress like shit.  Like, oh, I’m gonna run up to the mall for a few hours, so I’ll wear stretch pants, keds, an oversized Christmas sweater and tease my hair to within an inch of it’s life.  And true story – this was an outfit I witnessed yesterday not Christmas 1986.  Delightful.  I guess my big problem is that if you are going to the mall to shop, you should probably dress like the clothes you’re planning on buying.  Like with shoes.  If you are going out to buy sneakers, you wouldn’t wear pumps or sandals.  

Am I being wrong? I mean am I expecting too much from people?  I suppose part of it has to do with laziness and how you were raised.  My mother used to let us out of the house in whatever we wanted and those pictures are pretty embarrassing now.  So somewhere around high school, I took active pursuit in making sure that my clothes were appropriate for the situation.  And now, I wouldn’t imagine dressing like shit to go shopping.  I mean there’s nothing wrong with looking like a damn fool when you go out on your patio for a smoke or if you run down to CVS because you ran out of Diet Coke and now need more. NEED MOAR.  But there’s something wrong to me about looking like shit when you go to the mall. 

I am also calling for a general campaign to end Crocs.  FOREVER.  I won’t even link to their website out of fear someone might stumble upon this blog and follow the link and then actually buy some of them.  THEY ARE RUBBER SHOES THAT ARE BAD FOR YOUR FEET.  As I tell my dog: